Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride To show to the royal villagers her fair and pure white hide. The most observant man of all, an engineer of course, Was the only man who noticed that Godiva rode a horse. CHORUS: We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the engineers. We can, we can, we can, we can demolish forty beers. Drink rum, drink run, drink rum all day and come along with us. For we don't give a damn for any old man who don't give a damn for us! An artsman and an Engineer once found a gallon can, Said the artsman ``Match me drink for drink, let's see if you're a man.'' They drank three drinks, the artsman falls, his face was turning green, But the Engineer drank on and said ``It's only gasoline.'' Caesar set out for Egypt at the age of fifty three, But Cleopatra's blood was warm, her heart was young and free. And every night when Julius said goodnight at three o'clock, There was a Roman engineer waiting just around the block! An engineer once staggered in though the Roderick Gate, He was carrying a load you would expect to ship by freight. The only thing that kept him upright and on his course, Were the boundary conditions and the coriolis force. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Ballad of 5.60 (To the tune of ``The Battle Hymn of the Republic'') Free energy and entropy were whirling in his brain With partial differentials and greek letters in their train While delta, sigma, gamma, theta, epsilon and pi Were driving him distracted as they danced before his eye. CHORUS: Glory, glory dear old thermo Glory, glory dear old thermo Glory, glory dear old thermo, We'll pass you by and by. Heat, Content, and fugacity revolved within his brain Like molecules and atoms that you never have to name. And logarithmic functions doing cakewalks in his dreams, And partial molar quantities devouring chocolate creams. They asked him on the final if a mole of any gas In a vessel with a membrane through which Hydrogen could pass Were compressed to half its volume what the entropy would be If two-thirds delta-sigma equalled half of delta-P. He said he guessed the entropy would have to equal four Unless the second law should bring it up a couple more But then, it might be seven if the Carnot law applied, Or it might be almost zero if the delta-T should slide. The professor read his paper with a corrugated brow. For he knew he'd have to grade it and he didn't quite know how 'Til an inspiration in his cerebellum suddenly smote, And he seized his trusty fountain pen and this is what he wrote: Just as you have guessed the entropy, I'll have to guess your grade, But the second law won't raise it to the mark you might have made. For it might have been a 100 if your guesses all were good, But I think it must be zero 'till they're rightly understood. Glory, glory dear old thermo Glory, glory dear old thermo, Glory, glory dear old thermo, We'll try again next term. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tech Cheer E to the U du dx, E to the X dx! Cosine! Secant! Tangent! Sine! 3 point 1 4 1 5 9! Integral, radical, mu dv Slipstick, slide rule, M.I.T.! X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm) & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845 Salted Slug Systems Strange 408-454-9368 Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766 realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 415-567-7043 Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102 Tomorrow's 0rder of Magnitude Finger_Man 408-961-9315 My Dog Bit Jesus Suzanne D'Fault 510-658-8078 Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives, arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality, insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS. Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are, where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother. "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X