______ ______ ______________ | | | | \ | \ / \ / ____ \ ______| | |________| | / \ | |____ | ________ | ( {} ) | _____) /~~~~~~~~~~~ | | | | \____/ | |______ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~\ | |~~~~~~~ / \ / \ / | ~~~~~~~~~| | | | |______| |______| /_____________| | | | | | | | | ...Hogs of Entropy Text Files Present... | | | | | | | | "My Application to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE]" | | | | | | | | | | | | By: Thanatos | | | | | | \ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ / ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is just something for anyone who needs to know how to write a college essay. Just print this out, and send it everywhere. Actually, if anyone actually sends it, don't blame me if they don't accept you. This should seem funny to anyone who ever had to deal with with whole college process. In Response to the question, "What are your reasons for applying to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE]?" There are several reasons why I am applying to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE]. I am basing my decision on social, political, and economic factors in my life, factors which all steer me towards that college in particular. First of all, I attend a high school with an excellent academic program. As such, a significant number of my friends will be going on to college. This creates a pressure on me to follow in their footsteps; How can I waste my talents? they ask, Don't I know the rest of my life is at stake? They assume that simply because everybody else is doing it, so should I. They're partly right- with so many of my peers planning to attend college in any number of different cities, my immediate social environment is about to fall apart. Rather than allow that to happen, there is an additional pressure on me to supplant my high school friends with another group of people my age - a task which could be facilitated by college attendance. I have selected [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] in particular, because the breakdown of the typical student admitted to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] leads me to believe that I will get on smashingly there. Another factor is politics; in particular, the politics of my school. Due to its excellent academic program, it has a tradition of sending 100% of its graduates on to some form of higher education. All of the teachers and administrators assume that everyone will be going on to college, and look down on those who haven't made such plans. Given that the respect of my teachers is an important factor in an enjoyable school year, I must at least go through the motions of planning a post-secondary education. An example of the pressure school politics exerts is that in November, the teachers were ordered not to teach their respective subjects for an entire week, so that the seniors could write their college essays without too much stress - and that is in addition to the mandatory college-essay writing we endure in English class. Rather than jeopardize the goodwill of my teachers, I choose to do the expected; I will write those essays, fill out those applications. [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] is an excellent choice, because it is well known and very respectable; it is a name which puts my teachers at ease. The third factor in my decision to apply to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] is a matter of finances. This factor has two tiers, one during and one after a college education. What happens after a college education is a big encouragement for colleges in general, as well as [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] in particular. Statistics show that college graduates are more likely to get well-paying jobs than those who never attended, and [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE]'s reputation for job-placement makes it an especially sensible choice in today's variable economy. During a college education, the finances are a matter of costs: simply put, [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] is more affordable than many other institutions. Not only are the costs not as excessive, but my standardized test scores, grades, talents, and skills are all things attractive to [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE], and the school will (hopefully) be willing to reward me with a scholarship. All that being said, what the situation boils down to is this: due to pressures exerted from factors in the situation in which I have found myself, I have resigned myself to the idea of applying to colleges; further, I have found [NAME OF COLLEGE HERE] to be the best all-around choice. |=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=| | _____ Call Goat Blowers Anonymous for the LATEST HOE! _____ | | 6/ ^..^ (215) 750 - 0392 ^..^ \9 | | \_____(oo) This Issues Featured Support Board is: (oo)_____/ | | WW WW The DreamScape WW WW | | (913) 897 - 0433 | | ...the kings of modern goofiness... | |=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=| Copyright (c) 1994 HoE Publications and Thanatos. #62 -> 04/12/95 All rights Reserved.