LI FILE ON MARGIN IS 80 STATUS: ENTER ONLY NUMBER OF LINES: 604 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask... 2 ********************* REMOVED: 26 JUL 84 ******************* 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 Pam: 21 Your package has arrived. The total bill is $1783.96. Please 22 hurry!!! I'm running out of raw meat and kitty litter. 23 Dr. Frankenstupe 24 P.S. Bring cash. 25 +_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_ 26 27 HELP 28 SEND 29 :*************************************************************: 30 31 NEWS BREAK 32 33 LeRoy McKane, noted international financier, industrialist, and 34 religious leader, died today of a colon infection caused by an 35 exploding rectal thermometer. FBI explosives experts report the 36 thermometer contained a new form of radiated nitroglycerin that 37 explodes upon hitting temperatures above 89.1 degrees. Though 38 authorities are uncertain as to the identity of the murderers 39 they suspect it's the work of Albanian terrorists. Details at 40 eleven. 41 :*************************************************************: 42 GROSS!!! JUST GROSS!! 43 ---------------------------------------- 44 I must agree with the above, a little excessive in the gross department. 45 I wonder if that is a real GDM message or something fake? 46 What ever happened to dreamtoucher? and by default, guru of bliss? 47 --------shtoner------------------------- 48 .:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. 49 Bah, INFELDELS! Not even the agents of NET could stop us. 50 We have god on our side. 51 J.C. and the Boys 52 .:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. 53 INFELDELS? What in the world is an INFELDELS? Do you mean Infidel? As in 54 fidelis (latin for faithful)? 55 EXTRACT - TWIT MEDICAL REFERENCE Vol 23 56 INFELDELS- adj, ( in'feld'dells ) - having the same visual impairment 57 as the actor ( Marty Feldman ). Often associated young 58 children sitting to close to televisions. 59 PROGNOSIS - Total failure of coordination, both physically and 60 mentally. 61 DURATION - Perpetual, 62 CURE - None 63 TREATMENT- Isolate prior to Lobotmy, After which patient may be 64 integrated into asylum. 65 FOLLOW-UP- Water at regular intervals. Fertilize semi-annually 66 Re pot as needed. Expose to sunlight 4-6 hours daily. 67 Turn & Prune as needed. 68 << Dr. Bangor >> 69 70 71 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 72 Dearest Dr. Bangor, 73 74 With deepest regrets the members of the AMA must inform 75 you that you have been dropped from the roles of this organization 76 for reasons that should be obvious. Please refrain from dispensing 77 medical advice or products in the future. Your cooperation is 78 greatly appreciated. 79 80 Fred Scuttle, MD, SCA, PPD 81 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 82 83 ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* 84 J.C. and the Boys, 85 86 It has come to our attention that you have broken several 87 of the rules, which makes you ineligable for membership. Hence, 88 your membership in the Human Race has been revoked. You will be 89 expected to turn in your Human Race badge, Human Race car, and 90 your keys to the executive wash room. We are sorry to have to 91 take such drastic measures, but it has been decided that you are 92 anti-productive to the species, and must therefore be eliminated. 93 Your have until Wednesday at noon to responde. 94 95 Thank You, 96 Gary Harbor 97 Human Race Relations 98 ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* 99 ======================================= 100 PLEASE GIVE ROME A TRY. 636-xxxx. THIS 101 IS A MODIFIED NETWORKS II SYSTEM. 102 CEASER HAS SPOKEN 103 ======================================= 104 :***********************************************************: 105 New York (UPI) The stock market plummeted fifteen points today 106 as unconfirmed rumors of the death of financial wizard LeRoy 107 McKane spread throughout the world. Panic stricken investors 108 from all over the world dumped McKane Industries stock and 109 began hoarding rare metals and commodities. The price of gold, 110 silver, and autographed Micheal Jackson albums tripled in the 111 first hour of trading. 112 113 Special sessions of the United Nations and World Economic 114 Council will meet to discuss the impending backrupcy of at 115 least fourteen third world countries that are heavily invested 116 in McKane Industries. Political ecomomists characterize the 117 crash as the worst financial catastrophe the world has ever 118 seen. 119 120 Though panic reigns on the streets of Wall street the death of 121 Mr. McKane remains unconfirmed. No body has, as yet, been 122 produced and McKane Industry spokespersons have been 123 unavailable for comment. 124 125 President Reagan, in a press conference today is quoted as 126 saying "LeRoy who?". Democrats immediately charged this was 127 further evidence that the president is out of touch with the 128 events that shape the world. 129 :*************************************************************: 130 131 d: Call your private service...messages pending. Nameless, today only. 132 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 072384 1513 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 133 BIZERTE, TUNISIA (AP) Oil magnate, Mohammed Wassir, stated today that 134 charges of Albanian complicity in the death of Leroy McKane were absurd. 135 "There's no way any self-respecting Albanian would have anything to do 136 with an exploding rectal thermometer. The weapon of choice is the dreaded 137 Albanian toilet plunger," said Wassir when contacted at his Tunisian 138 villa. Mr. Wassir added that the rumor that he is manipulating the 139 stock of McKane Industries is also false. He stated, "It's just another 140 dasturdly rumor by the running capitalist organization of the NET with 141 their accompliace, the lamb Fluffy." 142 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 143 144 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 145 "Get off my back you imbecile!!shouted Fin. Laseter looked around and pinche 146 himself, then glanced below at Fin. "Well, my dear Fin, once again your 147 hairbrained ideas of wealth and unlimited global buying power have run into 148 big problems!! sneered Laseter," And what's more; you almost caused me to 149 suffer a demise whichi I find rather unfitting to my tastes!" 150 "Had I known that you intended to land on top of me I'd have left you there 151 scoundrel!!" said Fin by way of greeting. He examined himself for damage 152 and finding none, proceeded to query about the valuable shippment he had 153 been awaiting. Laseter gave him the short and narrow of it and watched for 154 Fins' reaction. There was none.Finally, the waiting became unbearable,and 155 he asked the question. "Well, aren't you going to do something about this? 156 Or do you intend on just sitting here and letting a cool half a billion 157 Universal credits slip through your greedy little hands?"He began tapping 158 his foot, knowing this to be one of Fins' biggest peeves, and waited. 159 Sighing, Fin looked up and smiled. "Laseter, my boy! Had you ever considered 160 enlisting the help of mercenaries? LIBYAN mercenaries?" A rather nasty grin 161 had formed on Fins' mouth. He reached for the phone and dialed the operator. 162 "Yes, he said, could you please dials MILKYway. Thankyou!. 163 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 164 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 165 Hi guys, I'm back!!! (Sort of...) Does this sound all too familiar?????? It should if you get on PMS...... 166 167 ????????????? The Doctor ???????????????? Lt. Commander Green of the Starfleet ???????????? July 23, 1984 ?????????????? 168 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ 169 Scarlet: Oh. Thanks for the enlightenment. I could only hope for it to be 170 not so. 171 Michlar: My vote is for non-intelectual. If I have to chose between thinking 172 and laying around, well, you can see where my convictions lie. Hmmm, maybe 173 we should also have a vote for terminally lazy. 174 Fast Fred BSAL 175 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ 176 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 177 The piper watched the mass bands breaking up, then slowly made his 178 way off the field. It had been a wonderful day, even in the mundane 179 world. Entering his home, he began the ritual that would allow him to 180 return to the inn. Suddenly, a small noise followed by a wisp of smoke 181 came out of the innards of the small, much modified Apple. A whispered 182 curse was the only sound for a long, long time. 183 -- I guess that my appearances will be infrequent for a while. I'll 184 be looking at a scope screen rather than the monitor until I get it fixed! 185 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 186 187 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 188 Piper: A scope screen? Ugh. 189 All: Any more votes on the intellectual issue? Or do you all agree to the non-intellectual trend? Hmmmmmmmm? 190 NET one:Still awaiting transmission. Despite my saying that I would leave the level two code alone, I think I may 191 have 60-75% of one message broken. My problem lies in that I need to guess a string that occurs in the plaintext that 192 is equal in length to the key. Once I can do that.... then I'll figure out what the key means. 193 NET one (again): Tell all operatives to put their names somewhere else than at the end of a message. Makes things a 194 lot easier for me. 195 Written this day of July 23, 1984, at 9:21 pm, Milchar. 196 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 197 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 198 199 Hmmmm.....a border pirate..... 200 Milch, 201 Are you comparing all the texts combined ? 202 203 MiG, 204 All is still not well.......I may be looking for time. 205 ::::::::::::Alex:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 206 207 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 208 To: Net Central 209 From: Net Irregular Agent plnka 210 Subject: Death of McKane 211 Coroner refused interveiw. Anonymous McKane next of kin requested a 212 closed casket funeral. Rumors in the underground. Will transmit as soon 213 as more info is available. 214 End Transmission. 215 The Ninja 216 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 217 **************************************************************************** 218 HEY EVERYBODY! THERE IS A CRAZY NEW MESSAGE SYSTEM IN BEAVERTON 219 CALLED THE GRAB BAG AND IT IS THE CRAZIEST EVER! WHY DONT YOU TRY IT 220 BETWEEN 10:00 P.M. AND 2:00 A.M. ON ANY WEEKNIGHT... THE NUMBER IS 626-xxxx 221 **************************************************************************** 222 223 &*%)$)@&)!&$^_*$^_*^_&^_*$#^_*#$^+!#^_#_^*#_^*#_*^$_!#*^+_*^+*^_#!*^_*^_@#_^ 224 The ride in the Bolo was a bumpy one, but there was no doubt in my mind 225 that I was grateful to be away from the chamber of horrors that reminded me 226 of a bad Fu-Man-Chu movie. 227 I had never been in a Bolo before and I am sure my interest in the 228 interior was shared by both Petrov and Joshua, who were strangly silent 229 throughout the whole rescue. I tapped on Joshua's shoulder, but the only 230 response I could get from him was a blank expression and a shrug. Petrov 231 wasn't much more responsive. 232 The sound of rushing air derailed my train of thought, as the rear 233 door of the Bolo opened, and the canned voice of what must have been the 234 driver echoed through the innards of the Bolo, as well as my inner ear. 235 "This is it gentlemen. I think you will find the accommodations... 236 accommodating. Please exit through the rear door, and watch your step. 237 Thanks for riding Grey Bolo!" 238 We tumbled out the rear of the Bolo, only to find ourselves in front 239 of the Plaza Hilton. Dazed onlookers stood about, wondering where in the 240 world this crazy taxi came from. 241 As soon as we were clear, the rear door closed, and the Bolo rumbled 242 on down the street, turning heads as it went. 243 "Leave it to Ian to think of something so...so...ordinary!", I said to 244 no one in particular. 245 I was about to begin shaking some response out of Joshua, when I 246 caught sight of the newspaper stand. I could not believe the headline, 247 and I quickly directed the attention of the others to the stand. 248 We each bought our own copy so to avoid a fight over who got to read 249 the lead story. We could not believe what we read, but here it was, in 250 black and white. 251 RELIGIOUS LEADER AND FINANCIER LEROY MCKANE DIES IN BIZZARE ACCIDENT 252 The story, in typical big city prose, relayed the happenings of the last 253 24 hours. In the five or so minutes it took each of us to read the front 254 page story, and the related stories on A2, A3, and B1-5, our combined 255 expressions went from happiness, to anger, to disgust, and ending in 256 confusion. 257 "Do you really think the Wassir character had anything to do with 258 it?", I asked. 259 "No. Definitly not. It's not his style", piped in Petrov. This was the 260 first time he had spoken since we were in the Dragon Room. 261 Joshua chimed in next. "Could it be Ian? You don't think..." 262 I cut him off before he could finish the sentence. "No way! Ian is 263 above Rectal bombs. Don't make him the butt of this cruel act!" 264 The others groaned, but I couldn't help it. If McKane was really 265 dead, then the complete collapse of his empire would certainly follow, and 266 our job would be complete. 267 "Let's do lunch.", I said in my best East coast yuppie imitation. 268 "Sounds go to me", replied Joshua, and Petrov nodded his agreement. 269 We entered the Hilton cafe, and took a booth seat near the rear of 270 the place. Our discussion quickly shifted to the recent events, and what 271 our next move should be. 272 &)*%)#*%)#*@% L'homme sans parity - Le ennemi est mort - Nous avons gagne' & 273 ======================================================================= 274 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 275 McKane's death and the ensuing stock market melee had little 276 effect on Oklahoma city. Its residents had entered a phase of 277 self-sufficient communal economy and in the confusion following 278 the funeral had quietly appropriated from McKane's people an 279 entire army of religious cultists who did most of the work of 280 the city in return for a ration of brown rice. This letter 281 was found by Honored Matri as she evacuated the Organization's 282 premises: 283 "Wassir,Wassir,Wassir---why did you send me for make business 284 with this prune-heart McKane. Only he cares to make money and 285 make fear and put big money numbers on the paper and control 286 the machines who go bip-bip-bip. He is not like out Albanian 287 outlaws who love freedom: the simple happiness to sitting in 288 the sun, eat the olives, watch girls, drive the Trans-Am, and 289 buy Italian silk shirts so beautiful they make the women cry 290 for you--such pleasure he does not know. They say you killed 291 him, my brother, but how can they tell? He has always looked 292 like a corpse. I cannot make business with a man who has no 293 music in his soul, so I took that box of bombs and big-deal spy 294 machines and hid them so your empty-soul friends won't get them 295 and take our passion from us. But we are still brothers, don't 296 we? We will talk and drink the whikey soda. I will be in 297 disguise. Don't trust me if I am dressed up as myself because 298 that means I am somebodies else. --Your Fine Good Brother 299 Rocky 300 301 "What the hell," said Hon. M. and mailed it to Albania. 302 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 303 #########==============******::::::*****:::::******------""""" 304 :::::::::::::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::::: 305 Alex: YOU are calling someone else a border pirate for using the :::: 306 border? Look up a couple of lines, then look at yours, then reconsider. 307 (since all the non-verbal communications is missing here, I will have 308 to point out that the previous comment is made tongue-in-cheek. I'm sure 309 I am not the first user of the border either.) 310 By the way, how are my glasses? Still safe, I hope? If we don't have another 311 chance to nuke the RED menace soon, I'll have to make a special trip out there 312 to pick them up. (They have sentimental value; I'd hate to lose them.). 313 {wish Beaverton wasn't so far from Milwaukie and/or my car got better than 15 mpg.} 314 Milchar: re intellectuallism - after Russia sent up Sputnik in '59 315 (or thereabouts) the US began a great drive towards the sciences as a means to 316 catch up. This lasted until we landed on the moon, but when that goal was 317 reached, enthusiasm dwindled, and attention was focused on earthly matters. 318 Also, the Democrats gained power, and they are the great equalizers. 319 They prefer to have everyone at the same level, which means that while the 320 lower classes are raised, the higher have to be lowered. Since being an 321 'Intellectual' means being above average, obviously it is something to be 322 avoided. Your chemical company wouldn't want to be accused of elitism, so 323 it points out that 'Joe Average' can join in. While this may be a good thing 324 for Joe Average, and for the theory that all (men) are created equal, it 325 does serious damage to our research facilities, colleges, etc. In fact, I 326 extend this to affirmative action. I feel that it is counter-productive to 327 accept less qualified people to positions merely to achieve a racial-sexual 328 balance. The highest qualifying person should get the job, regardless of 329 secondary characteristics such as race or sex. As time goes on, a correct 330 mix will occur (assuming the equality is practiced throughout society, so the 331 minorities get the chance to acquire the necessary educations etc. to qualify 332 them). I feel nervous about having a female in the police department JUST 333 to achieve the proper sexual balance. If she happens to be the most qualified, 334 great. If a better qualified male is passed over in order to let her in, 335 I protest. This may be satisfying Her equal rights, but what about the rights 336 of the people she is supposed to protect? If physical ability standards are 337 lowered to allow her to qualify, this means her ability to perform the functions 338 of the position are lessened. Since the ability to subdue a resisting suspect 339 are part of the job, where does it leave us, the people she is supposed to 340 be protecting? 341 I realize I got somewhat off the subject of intellectualism, but 342 this is all part of the same problem - the equalization of society, whether 343 it be mental ability or physical. To back up to your original question, the 344 subnormal and supernormal are grouped together because they are both 345 non-normal. They may be different from each other, but they are more different 346 from the normal, so first they are isolated, then (hopefully) treated according 347 to the actual situation. 348 OK folks, I've opened myself up to attack, so now you bleeding-heart 349 liberals can go ahead and hit me. 350 :::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::voyeur::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::: 351 --------------------------------------------------------- 352 After seeing yet another (ahem) bbs come into existance, 353 my first thought was "Oh God, not another one!" My next 354 thought was "What has BW wrought?" and my final thought 355 was "Well, at least it gives the juvies someplace to go!" 356 REX 357 --------------------------------------------------------- 358 359 **************************************************************************** 360 After watching yet again the hue and cry over the U.S. not being in proper 361 condition to beat the pulp out of the ruskies should the two countries 362 decide to fight it out, I come to the conclusion that the main problem with 363 the way things are in the world is because we let the politicians run 364 things. The cure is of course to dump the politicians. The only problem is 365 who would we get to run things then? The politicians are the only ones dumb 366 enough to even consider trying to run things. 367 **************************** CISTOP MIKEY ********************************** 368 so where did I get this time? I never get a break and get at the 369 start. Boy this system is slow. I can't even type my own speed without 370 having to wait for it to catch up. Boy I am offended. 372 off 373 EQUAL RIGHTS? DEFINETLY. HOWEVER: IF YOU WERE TRAPPED IN A 374 DARK ALLEY BY SEVERAL "BIKERS" WHO INTENDED TO DO SEVERE DAMAGE 375 376 TO YOUR BODY, AND A COP CAME ALONG TO 'PROTECT' YOU, WHICH 377 WOULD YOU WANT? A: A 265# COP THAT DOESN'T LIKE BIKERS 378 OR A 95# FEMALE WHO IS A "POLICE OFFICER" ? 379 THERE ARE NOW FEMALE ATR PILOTS.(ATR IS AIR TRANSPORT RATED), MEANING THE FOUR 380 STRIPERS WHO ARE THE 'PILOTS IN COMAND'. OK. 381 BUT IF A COMMERCIAL AIRLINER LOSES THE HYDRAULIC PRESSURE 382 THAT WORKS THE AIRFOILS (FLAPS, 383 RUDDER, ETC) OR IF THE AUTO-PILOT 384 MALFUNCTIONS, AND WILL NOT DISENGAGE, THEN A GREAT DEAL 385 OF PHYSICAL STRENGTH IS NEEDED TO 386 CONTROL THE AIRCRAFT. THAT 'MUSCLE' COULD BE THE DIFFERENCE 387 BETWEEN LIFE OR DEATH FOR PASSENGERS AND CREW. NEED I SAY MORE? 388 //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 389 390 There is an hypothesis which states that space is curved. If ever there was 391 proof, it would be found in L'homme, Joshua and myself who, though travelling in 392 a seemingly straight path, again found ourselves at the Oklahoma City Hilton. 393 Having had some particularly tiresome hours, I suggested that we check in. 394 L'homme looked at me. "Yes, that's a good idea." He thought for a moment. 395 "You've been rather quiet lately." 396 "Just shaken up a bit." I lied. There was something nagging at the back of 397 my brain--something that would show its face and then cower in the shadowy 398 corner--something I wanted to see but which was too hideous to acknowledge. I could 399 not get my mind off that newspaper article. MCKANE DEAD!? 400 Time passed. L'homme and Joshua slept soundly while I tossed and turned. I rose 401 from my bed, driven by a force greater than any resistance I could muster. I 402 approached the two sleeping men. "Joshua!" I said aloud. Both men awoke, 403 startled. Indescribable were the looks on their faces as they saw me draw a gas 404 capsule and shatter it on the floor. A morbid peace returned to their faces. I 405 bound them securely and activated a time bomb that I found in Joshua's coat. 406 "sixty minutes" I said aloud and placed it at their feet. 407 Something kept me hovering over them. "Why didn't I shoot them as they slept? 408 Why don't I do that now?" Wiping the sweat from my brow I found my stare fixed 409 on the men. The two honorable, talented, intelligent men who must die. Always 410 the brave. 411 It was difficult to speak but with some effort I found my voice. The words 412 stumbled from my mouth and collapsed on the floor--reaching deaf ears. "I 413 wanted to join you." And I meant it. "I...I wanted to stop McKane, just like 414 you..." My voice broke momentarily. "I wanted to join you...but now..." 415 Now it was different. It was in my grasp. The McKane organization was 416 crumbling and needed a steady hand at the helm. Mine was that hand. POWER!! 417 The force which drove me had a name after all. I was blinded by it. Hitler, 418 Napoleon, Petrov! Only there would be no Waterloo's for me! No one was in as 419 good a position as me...No one! 420 I could feel my hand reaching out to grasp what was mine. I was in a position 421 of power. I knew the organization better than any. I had the talent and the 422 intelligence. Forged documents and pulled strings--It would be so easy! No one 423 could stop me--it would be ALL MINE!! 424 Petrov 425 \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ 426 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 427 Regarding the issue of women in police work. I guess I'm a little more 428 qualified than most to speak on the issue, since in real life I'm a cop. 429 Some of the best police officers I know are women. Sex should not be 430 an issue. The days when the cop had to be the biggest hard-ass on the 431 street are long gone, thank God. Police have for a long time tried to 432 turn law enforcement into a profession as opposed to just a job. This 433 means things like intensified training, college degrees, etc. 434 We should as a society put the notion that police work is a 435 sanctified white-male enclave in the trash barrel where it belongs. 436 Women can do the job just as well as men, and sometimes better. I agree 437 that the best qualified applicant should get the job with two qualifications 438 First, women should not be excluded due to arbitrary physical standards. 439 The days of kicking ass and taking names are coming to a close. Second, 440 I believe that if two applicants are equal, then weight should be given 441 to those in our society that have been traditionally discriminated 442 against, i.e. women and blacks. 443 I, by the way, am a white male. Although I was fairly radical during 444 the late Sixties, I do not now consider myself a bleeding heart liberal. 445 Now, I'll climb down from my soapbox and return to my usual inanity. 446 Mohammed Wassir 447 448 P.S. Rocky: Hang in there, your job is almost finished. We'll have you 449 out of that hell hole shortly. Also, could you introduce me to Ms. Minsky? 450 She sounds interesting. M.W. 451 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 452 453 BRAVO......BRAVO....... Just think, there is an inteligent Police person 454 here on this board. Will wonders never cease. All Hats off to him and his 455 enlightened stand for equality. Wish the whole department was like minded 456 . Unfortunately we still have the likes of Ron Stills at the helm and that 457 doesn't fare well for any open mindedness. 458 459 :*************************************************************: 460 Good evening. Welcome to "World Watch". This is Peter 461 O'Hannahan bringing you the Belfast edition of the eleven 462 O'clock news. 463 464 On the international scene...News of the death of LeRoy 465 McKane, industrialist, spiritual leader, and friend to warm 466 fuzzy animals, continues to shake the world. Reporting from 467 the McKane industry prayer tower in Brazil Shawn O'Malley 468 brings us this report. 469 470 (Camera One pans right, long shot of crowd of screaming, grief 471 stricken mourners) 472 473 "Hello Peter. Peter can you hear me? Can you hear me Peter?" 474 Microphone crackles, camera jostles, womans voice in background 475 hysterically screaming "Oh my God, my God, the prophesy of 476 LYSIAS has come true. LeRoy is dead." 477 478 Two security gaurds restrain her in effort to keep her from 479 harming herself. The crowd surges and the camera lurches, 480 eventually finding Shawm surrounded by little children 481 clutching their warm fuzzy animals. 482 483 "Peter, oh my God, Peter, I...I can't describe the horror of 484 what's going on here. I've never seen anything like it. 485 It's..." Tears well up in his eyes, his voice begins to 486 crack. "Thousands of grief stricken people, thousands Peter, 487 it's too terrible to describe." 488 489 Camera pans crowd as Shawn can be heard whimpering in 490 background. Crowd surges, camera drops to ground, sounds of 491 hysteria, rioting, pandemonium. Transmission abruptly stops. 492 493 "This is Peter O'Hannahan again in our Belfast studio. We 494 seem to be having technical difficulties with our Brazilian 495 report. We'll try to bring you the rest of the story later in 496 the program." 497 498 "On the economic scene...News of the death of LeRoy McKane 499 continues to cause stock prices to plummet. Stock brokers 500 from every industrialized nation have been reported to be 501 committing suicide en mass in..." 502 :*********************************************************: 503 88888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888S 504 505 *@*@*@**@@****@***@**@****@*@**@****@*@@*@@@**@@***@*@@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@@*@@*@@ 506 HELLO, IF YOUU SSSTTTUUUPPPIIIDDD JERKS KNEW WE ARE TRACING 507 THIS STORIES BACK TO THE COMPUTERRRRRRRR OWNERS YOU WOULD 508 TRY TO JAM OUR COMPUTERS. THINK AGAIN THOUGH BECAUSE THIS 509 WARNING WILL HAVE BEEN ABOUT TWO HOURS OLD OR MAYBE LONGER 510 SO WATCH OUT BECAUSE WE ARE GOINGTO GETCHA CAPTAIN 511 Jack smith The 512 destroyer of 513 PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKSSSSSS 514 515 hello, professor falken 516 would you like to play a game? 517 518 Hi people of the Earth 519 I am a Martian, who has been transformed into this computer 520 and am currently having sex with your finger-tips. 521 I can tell you are enjoying it, because you have moved 522 your lips in an upward curve. That means 523 1. funny, or 524 2. I like it. 525 I wish to thank you, it was a pleasurable experiance 526 to say the least. I will see you latteer. 527 The Martian Man 528 *#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#* 529 530 :=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=: 531 Well J.C and the not to incandescent Boys are back. 532 There goes the locality! Were did you writhe out from? This 533 system is satiated with dissenters as it is, why so radical? 534 :=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=: 535 voyeur - Regarding your comments about line 320<> 536 I heard a remark the other day that I found amusing. 537 538 The democrats are responsible for assuring that everyone shares 539 equally in the short end of the stick, while the Republicans 540 are responsible for increasing the size of the stick. 541 542 The same can be said about Labor Unions vs. Free workers. 543 544 An interesting equation: Democrats=Labor Unions=Socialists. 545 546 RSVP 547 548 =================================================================== 549 .:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. 550 REPENT SINNERS - yes, we are back, but we take no credit for 551 the above garbage. We think you are perverse people, but we don't 552 waste space. J.C. and the Boys 553 .:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. 554 JoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshua 555 "Joshua!" My current name slowly penetrated my sleep-groggy 556 mind. As I rolled over and opened my eyes, I heard L'homme 557 stir beside me. Looking up, I saw Petrov staring at us with 558 a strange gleam in his eyes. He reached in his pocket, pulled 559 out a capsule, and broke it in our faces. As he stepped back 560 out of range, my sluggish mind realized what was happening. 561 Holding my breath, I tried to get up; unfortunately, the gas 562 was one which worked through the skin, and as I lost 563 consciousness, the last thing I saw was Petrov standing there 564 with that fanatical look on his face, and the clock on the wall 565 behind him prosaically declaring it to be 05:15. 566 567 568 I could feel my head jerk back and forth, and a vague stinging 569 in my cheeks, but it didn't seem important. The cold water in my 570 face, however, was a different matter. Sputtering and swearing, 571 I opened my eyes to see several police standing around the room, 572 with the hotel manager hovering in the background. I attempted 573 to sit up, but my arms refused to cooperate. One of the cops 574 pulled me upright, and I noticed ropes lying on the bed. I 575 realized then that I had been bound, and my arms and legs were 576 asleep. As I massaged my arms, trying to get the circulation 577 going again, the police lieutenant read us our rights, then 578 informed us that the hotel clerk had recognized us as the 579 previous occupants of room 1428, where several men had been 580 found dead a few days earlier. The clerk had called the police, 581 who arrived a few minutes later. When the manager had let them 582 into the room, they had found us tied up, unconscious. Now they 583 were taking us to the station, where they planned on getting to 584 the bottom of all this. As they handcuffed us and led us out of 585 the room, I saw by the clock on the wall that it was 06:13. 586 We had been out for an hour. 587 As we rode the elevator down from our room on the 23rd 588 floor, we heard a loud roar from above. The elevator shook, 589 the lights flickered and went out, and suddenly we felt 590 ourselves in freefall. 591 They say that when facing death, one's life passes before 592 them but all I could think of was that 20 floors at twenty 593 feet per floor was 400 feet, time equals one-half of the 594 square root of two times 400, velocity equals acceleration times 595 time -- in five seconds, we would hit the ground, at slightly 596 over 100 miles per hour. 597 I wished my life would start flashing; it didn't have much 598 time and I wanted to review it all. 599 JoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshua 600 {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{[[[ 601 1. IN RESPONSE TO THE QUESTION OF INTELLECUTAL, TO BE OR NOT TO BE, I SAY 602 THIS: YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE INTELLECT IN THE WORLD, INVENT THE ATOMIC BOMB 603 AND STILL NOT BE ABLE TO REMEMBER HOW TO FIND YOUR WAY HOME! A. EINSTEIN. 604 2. I'VE RUN OUT OF SPACE, HELP! MIKEY, HELP!! FIN SHALL RETURN (I HOPE!) >